Sucked into a vacuum
Into a vast black void...
In limbo
Does my mind do it's unrest.
Am I dead?
Some days merge into others
Without so much as a nod
In their direction.
All have become the same.
I feel so inhibited and strange.
So unlike who I thought I was.
Is this the canker that eats the soul away?
Or just the pause - before the illness reaps it's dreadful reckoning?
I do not know.
Struggling, white knuckled and bleeding
As I desperately cling to any sign of life there may be,
And there may be but a sliver left some days,
And the days wear on and on.
I seem to have no escape.
Something's boarded up the escape routes
And I am left to float forever
In this gray wretched nothing I've left.
And then the illness backs down.
Slinks away into it's ungodly realms
A mere shadow that lurks round my door.
And I sigh with relief once more.
Until the next time I'm ricocheted into the oblivion...
That is my life... on CFIDS.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
linda marie pharaoh-carlson©copyright, all rights reserved
posted on 'Help With ME' Message Board Community, 8-11-06
